The light post just sat there about a yard from the brown brick wall.

There was a tiny light shining from what appeared to be a tiny hole through the outer sheet metal covering at the base of the light post. One would certainly have found the ornaments and decorations covering a significant portion of the main body of the construction nice, had one ever spent time investigating the thing. 

Also, in the process of doing just that - investigating the post - one might have become interested in the little hole leading in to some sort of internal chamber there. Inside the light post. Moreover, if one applied a magnifying glass or something of that nature one would be intrigued to find a tiny civilisation in there. Cars, streets, tiny helicopters, even a small ocean and a number of vessels crossing from one side to the other. Tiny newspaper sellers and even a very nice cafe. Tiny, of course. One would probably be approached by one of the tiny men, an engineer named ‘Ned’. He would probably ask for Uranium. His reason would be to get their Nuclear plant working, to be able to go home, to the planet ‘Yk’. Yk is situated on quite the other side of the galaxy we refer to as the Milky Way, while Ned and his friends call it ‘Gah’.

They landed here on earth by mistake. They had no idea of our size. They hated our terrible planet and wanted to get away from here. They needed Uranium.

Of course nobody would ever consider supplying the Uranium for their starship. Ned and all his friends realized this, and tried to make a nice life for themselves inside the Light post there by that brick wall.

Ned had plans. He would investigate the outside. He packed a backpack with sandwiches and a towel. They had read in their religious scriptures, which they called ‘42’ that a towel was very useful for many purposes. It could be used as a weapon, one could hide behind it etc. Ned never left his home, which was more or less a piece of band aid, without a towel.

Now, Ned left the ‘inside’ through the tiny hole. Got to the outside and never saw a monster approaching from across the street. A hairy, drooling, barking monster. The monster was Mrs Weldon’s Cocker Spaniel Elvira. Elvira was a clever dog. She spotted Ned instantly as she walked by the post. Now Elvira she didn’t have any idea about anything other than her master, and how interesting it was to eat tiny bugs and such. Which was exactly what would become Ned’s destiny. To end his days by being eaten by a Cockerspaniel gal named Elvira who mistook him for an ant.

Ned didn’t see it coming, which might or might not have been a good thing, depending on ones viewpoint. On the one hand it may have been good in that the not-knowingness spared Ned’s nerves. He simply wooshed through the air attached to a tongue. The tongue was humid and warm, which was good. It smelled like dogbreath, which was not so good. Luckily Ned and his likes had no sense of smell, so that really didn’t matter. Woosh. Over. Yup. On the other hand one might argue that Ned could have escaped, had he been aware of the deadly Cocker gal approaching. That line of reasoning is more or less silly, though, considering the swift Cocker versus the three millimeter tall Ned. He could, of course, have jumped off of the post. Jumped towards painful and immediate death upon landing some two feet down on a chewing gum thrown there yesterday by one little boy called Aaron Livinski. Aaron Livinski who was to later in life become a chartered accountant at Meyer, Livinski & Gore, a financial services bureau on fifth street.

Well, anyway, Ned might have got caught in the gum, had he jumped for his life. We really don’t have to discuss this, I will reveal the outcome here and now: Ned was swiftly eaten by a Cocker Spaniel gal named Elvira. he didn’t feel anything. Nothing. One second it was bright and nice and a bit exciting, the next second it was nothingness. Nihil. Nada. Niente. Ned’s sister, Nadine, thought she heard Ned crying ‘Oh no!’ but she said she might just as well have imagined it. They all had to accept that Ned, good old Ned (well not too old, five days, but five days was half the expected life length in the Light Post).

There. That’s the story about a tiny alien named Ned, a light post, and a Cocker Spaniel gal named Elvira.